An old friend of mine is dying. I learned the news just this week and the truth is, I didn’t even know he was sick. Cancer. We were a part of the same church back in Atlanta. Then they moved, we moved a couple of times and we lost touch. Still, I was deeply saddened to hear that hospice has been called in. If you have some relationships that have atrophied due to distance or time or whatever, it would be good to reach out and reconnect. The unexpected turn in life is not a bug. It’s a feature.
He and his wife are as solid as they come. They were firm parents, but always fair, and raised two really good kids. We could use more like them. Fair, firm parents, I mean, but well-raised kids, too. Not always, but those two things tend to show up together.
I remember where they sat in Sunday church; back right corner of the auditorium as you looked out from the podium. I remember he had a quick smile and an easy laugh that betrayed a bit of mischief. I remember, too, that she pretty much had his number. More than once, I saw her give him that wordless look that wives who are married to waggish men learn to perfect. It’s a that’s-enough-from-you-mister look and it usually works.
My most poignant memory involves, of all things, a bottle of water. We were sitting in the family room of their home. He stepped into the kitchen and as he did, she asked him, “Would you bring me a water?” Just before he handed it to her – he twisted the cap to break the seal. I can still hear the tiny plastic tabs breaking – click, click, click.
“Thank you,” she said. But not in a surprised kind of way as if that level of micro courtesy was on display just because the preacher was visiting. No, the exchange was routine. Normal. A tiny but well-practiced little step in their marital dance.
Our cultural story tellers – the song writers, novelists and movie makers – have convinced us that love is at its best when it is expressed through the grand, the ultimate and the heroic. Love certainly shines in such moments – especially when backed by a stirring soundtrack. And it is true that Jesus once said the greatest love is when you lay down your life for a friend.
But he also celebrated the beauty of an extra mile walked. A prayer quietly lifted. An undeserved mercy extended. A cup of cold water given. Little things that no one but the recipient would notice. And maybe not even then. But God notices.
Ever since I saw my friend twist that cap, opening a bottle of water has been for me a kind of Pavlovian prompt. When I hear the click, click, click, I remember that love is not always monumental, herculean or resplendent. Often – nearly always – love is the simple gesture, the small kindness, the pocket-sized favors we do for each other every day.
I am certain my friend is surrounded by that kind of love in these last days. I like to imagine that when he finally crosses to the other side and sees Jesus, all of heaven will be waiting to welcome him. Someone will count 3 – 2 – 1! Then they’ll all simultaneously twist the caps off bottles of water and heaven will roar with joyous laughter.
Oh how I love this post and my heart hurts for my precious, long time friends from days past. Such great memories flood my soul…🙏🏻😊
Amen, Sheri. Keep praying.
Love the very practical yet meaningful response to an everyday occurrence. A very special tribute to someone who demonstrates kindness in such unassuming yet powerful ways. thanks for sharing Jody!
Thank you, Walton.
Thank you Jody for your wise words and willingness to remind us of really important things. What a privilege to witness such care, thanks for sharing and our sweet friends are in my prayers.
Thank you, Linda. Amazing how little things can mean so much.
Thanks Jody I think all can relate to special people like this
Steve
Amen, Steve.
Loved this Jody, great points
Thanks, Mike.
Wow!
Thanks Jody!
Thank you, Rodger.
You are spot on, Jody! And you are right. This is the treatment she (and he) often receives. It’s like as natural as breathing for them. Thank you for the post.
Thank you Cheri. Maybe we can all make it natural.
Jody,
Thank you for your words on love and simple actions that go along way. Such wisdom we can all learn from! I have read this over and over again as it gives me strength, and good memories, especially at this time. Praying for his peace and to be with Jesus soon.
Oh, Tammie. You are in our prayers. You and Pete showed us how to live in love. Now, you are showing us how to love till the end — and beyond.
What a precious reminder of how often it’s the little things that show our love and appreciation to those around us. Had me tearing up this morning. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you, Mary. Blessings.
I’ve read this several times. It is the everyday moments that show a deeper love. Thank you for that memory from a moment you shared with our friends.
Thank you Amy. Blessings.
Oh Jody, thank you for this sweet reminder. I love this and am so sorry about your friend.
Thank you, Conno. JV
So beautiful- important reminder that love is in the little actions first and foremost. Thanks Jody!
Hi Jody, Thanks for always hitting the spot that needs a little or a lot of attention.I saved this one! I believe those sweet little things that we have done for each other over and over make life easier when the path becomes more difficult. Pete struggles with Parkinson’s and remarks that I spoil him. I reply that he took care of me all the years that I had migraines and we aren’t worrying about who did what…we do these small things for each other out of love.
Now, We laughed about the following thing to tell on you. You had the Sunday night worshiper’s write down what they did every Christmas Eve. I wrote: We watch Die Hard and eat cookies with egg nog. Of course mine was the one you you readout loud 🤶🏻
Turner Classic Movies is selling a book titled “The Best Thirty Christmas Movies”. You will be glad to know that number 19 was Die Hard!! We laughed and remembered good times and many friends.
It’s always good to read your devotion blog!
Thank you. I needed this reminder to cherish the love of a spouse who doesn’t “get” grand romantic gestures, but instead takes out the trash, tops off the tank, opens water bottles, and does countless other things daily. Praying for your friend and his family.