Closer

I had this routine when I was a kid. I’d come home from school, pull a sleeve of saltines from the box and lay a dozen crackers out on the counter. I’d take three of those processed cheese squares and quarter them, put a piece of cheese on each cracker and stack them up. Then I’d pour a tall glass of sweet tea, carry it all into the living room, eat cheese crackers and watch Gilligan’s Island. Every day. Other than the fact that I was in love with Mary Ann, I can’t tell you why I was such a … Read more…

Housebroken Jesus

Do not fear getting older, for with age comes many advantages. Senior discounts on McDonald’s extremely hot and delicious coffee, for one. The freedom to filter less of what you say or write for another. And perspective. You can look back across the decades and see with greater clarity personal, historic and culturally important events and trends to which you were oblivious in the moment. Take the ‘70’s, for example. Judging from the music we listened to on the radio – no streaming back in those days – Jesus was really popular. Norman Greenbaum’s Spirit in the Sky, the rock … Read more…

Facebook Jesus

Everybody loves Jesus. Even people who don’t believe in God or abhor institutional religion really like Jesus. He’s awesome. I’m pretty certain that if Jesus dropped in tomorrow afternoon for an unscheduled visit, there would be parties and celebrations and parades. Even Wednesday night church would be packed. Everyone would be thrilled to hear what he had to say. Until he said it. Then they’d be offended. The invitations to appear on university campuses would be protested, then rescinded. Politicians would distance themselves from his remarks. Businesses that endorsed his message would be boycotted. He’d be crucified in the press. … Read more…